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What treacherous barber should agree to such depravity? Who takes mere money, or even soulless joy, in depriving our small community of such a simple but important act as luridly admiring Carlos’s stunning coiffe
— Cecil

Telly the barber, the man accused of being the one to cut Carlos' gorgeous hair (by two intrepid sources) is described by Cecil as being 5'9" with a small mustache, a thick potbelly, and speaking with a thick accent. He appears to have enjoyed sports, and his shop (located at the corner of southwest 5th Street and Old Musk Road) was decorated with pictures of combs, with a tell-tale spinning red and white pole out front, along with a sign reading "Telly's".[1]

Telly is found "wandering the Sand Wastes, howling at the sky, and holding up Carlos's shorn locks, as though begging God to reverse the crime he has done". Cecil says he's received reports that Telly's skin had started blistering, his eyes appeared bleary, and he was spotted attempting to give a cactus a haircut, "whispering and cooing into what he seemed to think was its ear"[2]. He also goes on to say that he is "not sorry to see Telly in this state, given his crime."

You briefly spot Telly out in the Sand Wastes, carrying a cactus and a pair of scissors. He howls at You as You pass. In "The Hierarchy of Angels" Larry Leroy tells the story about how he and Old Woman Josie once found Telly cutting a cactus' hair. [3]

In one of the many versions of the divergent timeline, after spending years in the desert deeply regretting cutting Carlos' hair, Telly tried to change the past so that this act which made people hate him never happened. This plan didn't work the way Telly wanted in to and caused the timeline to diverge, which created multiple realities existing at once. Carlos spoke to Telly, telling him that he loved the haircut and that his was the only opinion that mattered, because he got it for himself. He then asked Telly to come back to his community, which the barber did, reopening his shop and resuming old friendships. [4]



  • Telly's name may be a reference to Telly Savalas, the bald actor who starred in the "Kojak" TV series.
  • In the TV Series, "iZombie", during the episode, "Max Wager", there was a small reference to Telly (a hitman) and his potential employer, "The Barber".
  • While giving a haircut to 'The Mink' in "A Spy in the Desert", Telly accidentally cut his own foot off.


  1. Episode 3 "Station Management"
  2. Episode 9 ""PYRAMID""
  3. Episode 13 "A Story About You."
  4. Episode 133 "Are You Sure?"