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The Ralphs is a popular grocery store in Night Vale, located near the Dog Park.[3] Presumably, it was built as part of the Ralphs supermarket chain based out of Southern California, although for a time the Night Vale location was owned and operated by StrexCorp.[4] Night Vale Community Radio host Cecil Palmer and his husband, Carlos the scientist, seem to do most of their shopping there.[5]

Known employees[]

  • Adam Bair, former weekday shift manager. Though Adam was thought to have vanished from our reality forever after his exposure to StrexCorp's transdimensional oranges,[5] he was back on the job at a later date.[6]
  • Charlie Bair, current weekday shift manager. He was described as the "new" weekday shift manager in early 2016.[7]
  • Dave Boll, manager [1]
  • Neal Lu [2]

Products[]

Ralphs is, in most respects, a normal grocery store, and as such, seems to offer a typical selection of produce, meats, spices, and household items. It is noteworthy that Ralphs sells pasta, possibly in direct defiance of the City Council's eternal ban on wheat and wheat by-products.[5] It is likely that StrexCorp reversed the ban after they seized control of Night Vale, or perhaps not, and the pastas available at the Ralphs are all gluten-free and law-abiding. Ralphs very briefly sold StrexCorp's dangerous line of transdimensional oranges and transdimensional orange by-products to the exclusion of all other products, although they seem to have resumed standard operation following the recall of that product line.[4] A walk-in Beer Cave has been installed.[8]

The Many-Eyed Darkness Incident[]

At one point, a walk-in Beer Cave was installed at the store, however it was soon discovered by on of the store's employees that it contains a portal leading to a system of ice caves. An oracle warned the employee that the portal should be closed, but this warning was disregarded. Night Vale children seemingly knew about the danger, as many of the Ralph's drawing contest entries featured a multi-eyed darkness attacking the store. The darkness did eventually made its way into the store, where it went on a rampage, sucking many products into a vortex and starting a fire before leaving the same way in came. The damages were estimated to be around $200,000. Despite the police's warning about the portal it contained, the Beer Cave was not dismantled, as the store's management considered it crucial for the business' survival. A lone employee decided to deal with he danger himself before disappearing into the portal.[9]

The Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs[]

Main article: Hole in the Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs]

The Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs has played host to several important and strange events in Night Vale, and is home to the Hole in the Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs. It was the location where the Night Vale chapter of the Boy Scouts promoted their first two Eternal Scouts, and, as such, it was also the location of the burlap tent that around ten unfortunate citizens, including Scout Master Harlan, were dragged inside of by mysterious herds of malevolent, mute children, never to be seen again.[10] A tree with seven limbs grows at the lot.[9]

When mysterious black condos materialized in various locations around Night Vale, the Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs was, briefly, no longer vacant, and instead home to one of the perfect, featureless black cubes. It was this particular condo that Carlos toured and was nearly consumed by before Cecil's intervention. As all of the condos melted into the earth after a single day, it is likely that the Vacant Lot Out Back of the Ralphs is, once again, vacant.[11]

Mentions[]


References[]

  1. 1.0 1.1 Episode 174 "Radio Jupiter"
  2. 2.0 2.1 Episode 186 "The Many Lives of Frank Chen"
  3. Episode 1 "Pilot"
  4. 4.0 4.1 Episode 39 "The Woman from Italy"
  5. 5.0 5.1 5.2 Episode 38 "Orange Grove"
  6. Episode 61 "BRINY DEPTHS"
  7. Episode 83 "One Normal Town"
  8. Episode 168 "Secret Blotter"
  9. 9.0 9.1 Episode 168 "Secret Blotter]]"
  10. Episode 23 "Eternal Scouts"
  11. Live show "Condos"
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