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Dare to dream. Do it. We dare you. Go ahead, dream. It’ll be fine. We promise.
— Cecil

"Hatchets"is the 62nd episode of Welcome to Night Vale. It was released on February 15, 2015.


Night Vale Daily Journal editor Leann Hart announces changes at the newspaper, while continuing a successful execution of her most controversial business plan. Plus, a station editorial, a look at local traffic, and a parade for a local sports hero.

Plot Developments[]

  • Intern Death Toll/Intern Maureen: Maureen finally quits the NVCR Internship program after she is struck and very nearly killed by one of Leann Hart's hatchets, declaring it's no longer worth the risk of death.

Recurring Segments[]


Ask your doctor, just who he thinks he is. Say it just like that. Say, "Who do you think you are?" See if he starts crying. I know I would.
— Proverb


  • In journalism, the term "Hatchet Job" refers to a malicious critique or verbal attack in print - a term Leann Hart appears to take far too seriously, to the point of causing grievous bodily harm and loss of life to those whom she critiques.